Please Don't Let Me Forget

I want to remember today.

I want to remember the fact I woke up at Noon. I'll put it in my pocket as a bit of happiness when I have to get up at 6:30 come August 25th.

I want to remember my dogs wagging tail and morning snuggles in my bed. Ill also miss those come August.

I want to remember the detour my mom and I took driving home to pass "His" house so I could show her where my crush lived. Just in case we ever get in a fight, and I need a reminder that she's my best friend.

I want to remember the "just right" weather tonight. Especially when I will be walking in 10 degree weather in Logan.

I want to remember the group texts that were sent between my best friends and I today. Years down the road, we can laugh about them. 

I want to remember the clouds. I always seem to be happiest on a cloudy day. 

I want to remember what it feels like to write. Just in case I get lost.

I want to remember how much I have thought of you. And how crazy Ive been going this week because I haven't seen you. Ill be even more happy to see you the next time.

I want to remember what it was like to hear the words "I need you." even if it was for something small. I think people underestimate those words.

Nothing happened today that would be worth telling one day.

That doesn't mean I don't want to remember it.

Wishes for my Enemies

A List of Things I Would Wish Upon My Biggest Enemies

• Endless amounts of Wet Socks
• An entire day forced to watch a Pawn Stars marathon on the history Channel.
• To be the last one to get in the shower to find out everyones used all the Hot Water
• To have a fantastic hair day when all their friends are out of town and they have no where to go.
• To have Netflix Freeze during the most intense part of an episode.
• Uneven Chair legs.
• lots of stubbed toes on the corners of tables.
• 50 owed attendance schools.
• An awkward sunburn. Preferable from Sunglasses.
• The Schools Toilet Paper
• The fear of forgotten homework.
• A slobbery Kiss
• A hike in 100 degree weather
• Awesome comebacks they don't think of until its to late.
• Restaurants that only offer Pepsi products. 
• A charlie horse every morning when they wake up.
• Starting a period on the day they wear white shorts.
• working at a place where the majority of the customers dont speak English.
• To reach in their pocket and realize their $10 bill is gone.
• To get startled when using an Eyelash curler.
•  A wart on their toe in the summer.
• Dust in their contacts they cant get out.
• A 14 hour flight sitting next to a drunk man who sleeps with his mouth open
• The stomach flu on Thanksgiving
• The WiFi being down
• Their brand new phone gets dropped and shatters
• Papercut +Lemon Juice
• They get a carton of Ice cream out of the freezer only to find out someone put it there empty.
•  An alarm clock that wont stop ringing
• a sharp rock in their foot when walking barefoot
• A spider in their bed
•  generic brand microwave popcorn

Happy Birthday

Fireworks lit up the fourth of July sky
Telling the story of our freedom
I sat and watched like every other year      
But this time my heart was celebrating you

After all, it was also your birthday.

With every flash in the sky
My eyes lit up with color
Sorta like the way they do
When you tell me I'm beautiful.

With every loud *BOOM*
The beat hit through my soul
Kinda like your heartbeat
I felt when we cuddled.

With every sparkle and shimmer
I watched with amazement and wonder.
Kinda like the way I look at you,
And wonder why it took so long to REALLY see you.

With the finale coming nearer,
I waited with much excitement
Almost like the way I'm waiting now
For a kiss that creates fireworks in my stomach

The fireworks came to an end
Leaving nothing but smoke in the sky.
Kinda like the candles you blew out that night.
Happy Birthday America, but mostly to you...

Too bad I'm celebrating without you.

A Collection of Short Letters

Dear Bree-

I'm sorry you broke your Femur. Your Tibia. Your Fibula. I'm sorry you hit a Semi. You don't know how sick the words "Your sister has been in an accident." made me. You should also know how grateful I am to be able to drink diet cokes and watch Netflix with you I know that day could have gone very differently.

Dear God-

You saved my sister. I know it wasn't just coincidence she hit the one spot on the Semi that wouldn't have killed her. Thank you.


Dear Blog-

 I'm sorry I abandoned you for 3 weeks. Especially for the fact I cheated on you with Netflix.


Dear Cop that pulled me over-

Thanks for wanting to keep people safe. next time, don't ask me dumb questions of why I'm acting nervous when you pull me over. Also, I hope that wasn't your most happening case of the night. After all, you only pulled me over because there was a plastic cover on my license plate. You must have been bored.

Dear You -

I like cuddling with you. And I don't really care that you have a girlfriend right now. 

Dear Radio Stations -

Stop playing the same 10 songs. If I hear the songs "Best Day of My Life." and "Dark Horse" one more time I will take a baseball bat to my radio.

Dear mom-

I miss you. I miss girls nights.  I'm not ready to leave home to go to college. Is that okay?

Dear Rain-

You can stay as long as you want. I don't mind. 

Dear Self-

You have come a long way. Keep smiling.

A Summer of Innocence

 Truth is I miss you. I miss your magic your name would bring. I miss the happiness you brought. I miss the freedom you came with.

Mostly I miss your innocence.

Summer was everything back then. I was 10 years old. The last day of school I came home to a surprise water fight in my neighborhood.  Water balloons drenched my clothes, people were running around with water guns. Otter pops were handed out by the handfuls, and everyone was happy.

I spent summer nights with my friends. most of them were spent at Kohlers buying doughnuts and Jones Soda. Late at night I sat on my windowsill with my head against the screen as crickets chirped and the breeze blew through my undone hair.

Summer days were spent with my mom. Target runs, and convertible rides with the top down as we listened to Bon Jovi. this was one of our favorite thing to do together. I would tell her of my newest boy I had a crush on. I believed in Love, and Romance, and Happy endings.

I lived summer knowing It would be here again in the year to come.

I'm 18 now. The last day of school instead of Water fights and otter pops I  came home to a 7 hour shift.
besides even if I was offered an otter pop I wouldn't be able to stop worrying about this "bikini body'' I'm supposed to have for summer.

I still spend summer nights with friends, but I can't open my window at night because I sleep in the basement and that would be "dangerous.''

I called my mom today and asked her how she was at work.  I don't get to see her as often as I want, but she's still my best friend.

My parents are in a fight. Its awfully hard to believe in happy endings when you can hear him yelling through the walls.

I'm living summer not knowing when the next one will be.

But even still, the crickets chirp, there is plenty of Jones Sodas at Kohlers, and many convertible rides to be taken.

I just wish summer was still niave instead of growing up with me.

Stargazing With You

Meet me at there at dusk
Somewhere that's unknown

Beneath the violet canvas
That begs to be explored.

the wind will play our song
that we'll wish to play again.

Tree branches will be as our fingers
that are so tightly intertwined.

The mountains will be like blankets
that we have piled up on the grass.

the moon will be our source of light
 that makes our souls transparent 

the summer air that we breathe in
will be the photo we wish to capture.

The sky will be our movie
That we are waiting to rewind

the falling stars will be my heart.

When I fall for you tonight.
 

Saving You

"Its the artists that save people."
those words have been glued to me.
replaying in my mind constantly,
like a never ending reel tape.

I ignore it. Ive got finals tomorrow.

"Its the artists that save people."
my heart answers me again.
its voice has an edge to it
its wanting me to do more than just listen.

"To bad I have an F in math" I tell it.

"Its the artists that save people."
my eyes tell me to look at the sky.
They work hard in search of color
beautiful enough to paint a soul.

I argue. "I have an 8 hour shift to get through."

"Its the artists that save people."
my hands try telling me as they dance
to the rhythm of piano keys
chasing for a broken heart.

I try again. "But I only got 4 hours of sleep last night!"

"Its the artists that save people."
my brain tells me to write.
It flips through pages of words
worthy enough to find the lost.

 I place my hands up in surrender.

my hands dance, and my eyes search.

yet, I still haven't found a way to save you.

I haven't found the right shade of blue
To add to your empty canvas.
My fingers haven't found the melody
that your heart will want to sing to.

I certainly haven't found those words;
the ones that will talk you off the ledge.

but none the less, I write. I paint. I create a melody.

I'm failing math, I have finals to pass, I'm running on little sleep.

yet still I make art, hoping one day
to create something that saves you.