Comets and Bad Hair Days

You know that dance your fingers do when you don't know what to type? Your fingers dance and then you lift them up off the keyboard, pop your knuckles a few times, maybe take a drink of whatever drink is by your laptop (mine happens to be a coke) then think about what to write, change the song on your iPod, type something, hit backspace, and then repeat. I guess you could say that's where I am.

I've never been good at first impressions; maybe because I'm afraid to say the wrong thing. I think we all feel that way when opening up to people.

In case you missed my blog name, I'm Peyton Sawyer, and if you understand where my name comes from, you're my new best friend. If you don't know who she is though, let me tell you about her, because there is much of her in me. We have the same passion for music, interpreting the meaning of lyrics, and finding the beauty in music. I'd like to think that one day I would have a music collection as big as hers and with as much variety. I'd also like to think that one day I will drive her car..a classic blue '63 Comet convertible.Maybe I'd drive to watch the sunset, get inspired and write something equally as beautiful because who isn't inspired by sunsets?  I'd like to think I will find my Lucas Scott and he would write a book about me and about comets, and soul mates. In case you were wondering, I haven't found him yet. I'd like to think I could draw like her. I'm disappointed when I can't. I'd like to think I can rock the same hazel eyes that she has and hide my insecurities and fears and hurt behind them. I'm not great at that either.

Peyton isn't real. She is a fictional character, unlike me. There is no writers plotting my life, giving me the right words to say, or the perfect ending for every story line. I'm real. There are no makeup artists to cover every flaw. There isn't a hairstylist to fix a bad hair day. I wish there was. Everyday is unplanned and unscripted. It doesn't wrap up nicely at the end of each episode. Some endings are happy and some are sad. At the end of the day I wrote my life, because its my life to live...even if it is a bad hair day.

 
"You have one chance, one life and what you do with it is up to you." - Peyton Sawyer